Where Everything Went Wrong
by Parvulus
Summary: Bella dies and Edward sets out to avenge her death by killing James's true love. But the only problem is he has to join James's clan to do so. He finds out James doesn't love her, how will Edward get revenge now? James/Edward Warning: maleXmale & dark Ed
1. Bella's Dead

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Twilight, all I own is my own words.**

My first story on fanfick, so please be nice with those reviews ^^;

Warning: this is a yoai hence the James/Edward in the description…

~`~Bella's gone~`~

Edward's POV

We were too late. I felt tears rimming on my eyes as I stared at Bella's bruised and beaten body. James was long gone all that was left was a tape with my name printed on it, and the pieces of mirror with Bella's blood on it.

I fell to the ground in front of her body and let out an anguished scream, then curled up and started to sob as I hid my face in my hands.

Carlisle gently placed his hand on my shoulder, "Edward, it's going to be okay", he said quietly. Everyone else was keeping their distance they wanted to give me time to calm down, they were all worried about me. Esme worried that I would never recover, she was trying to think of things that would cheer me up. But nothing but the death of that cruel bastard James would cheer me up. I stood up surprising Carlisle, who stood up as well looking at me and wondering what I was doing.

I was going to hunt James down, I would make him pay, he was going to wish he never took my Bella's life. I heard Alice gasp as she saw my plan, I shot her a sharp glare to make sure she didn't dare to tell the others. Carlisle gave me a suspicious look already knowing I was planning something potentially dangerous. I didn't care what they thought and I fought to block their thoughts, I wouldn't change my mind now. I would do this for Bella.

"I'm leaving", I said to Carlisle with a dark glare daring him to deny me of leaving. I wasn't going to take no for a answer. One way or another I was leaving my family behind, after I got my revenge I was going to die as well.

Carlisle looked me in the eyes with a serious expression, judging my reaction, "fine, Edward. Please remember you will always be welcome back. We all love you, no matter what happens." He knew he wasn't going to be able to stop me, he though I was going insane though.

I nodded and ran off, not allowing anyone to give me a hug goodbye, I didn't want to change my mind because I saw the sad faces of my family. I ran to my car and drove, I could smell James's scent and I knew he wasn't going to make it hard for me to find him. He wanted a challenge, and I was going to give him much more than he bargained for. I had left the tape behind, I knew whatever was going to be on that tape wasn't going to be good. I did not want to see the look on Bella's face as that bastard drained her blood, as she wondered where I was.

I should have gotten there sooner now my love was gone, the one bright light I had in my years of loneliness and darkness. Nothing was going to be the same now that she was gone, there was no reason for me to live but to avenge her.

Please review, since I need to know if there is any interest in this story.

Also I would prefer if no one got made at me for killing poor Bella…


	2. Let's Make a Deal

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Twilight; all I own is my own words.**

Finally getting this story on its feet lol

And this chapter is going to be longer since my last chapter was way too short.

~`~Let's Make a Deal~`~

Edward's POV

I drove as fast as the car could take me still managing to avoid police officers at every turn. I ended up in the city in the next town, and had caught up to them. They were feeding in an alley way and they knew of my presence.

I got out of the car and waited in front of it, James wasn't going to run off this is what he had wanted. He was surprised I had caught up to them so fast; I only chuckled darkly at his thought.

He told Victoria to stay back in the alley and to feed, he wasn't going to let her get attack if I just shot out at him, and he wanted her to be there to attack if he needed help. He walked out of that alley his long blond hair tied back and his eyes practically glowing red.

I smiled at him darkly as he looked at me cautiously, he expected me to attack. He wanted to see the pain on my face, because he destroyed my love, Bella.

"I'm not going to attack you", I said my voice taking on a sinister tone. I knew he didn't believe me, he thought I was playing mind games. I couldn't help but let out another dark chuckle as an almost insane smile spread across my lips.

"Then what did you come here for, Edward", James asked eyeing me suspiciously. He was braced in case I just attack and Victoria was getting ready to attack me if I even attempted to get closer. "Your Bella's dead", James said, wanting to see the pain on my face.

"Oh, I know that, James", I said casually as if it didn't make my heart ache, I wasn't going to play his little game. "I realized how strong your coven is and I want to join it", I said watching James as is I was a cat and he was a mouse.

James's look darkened as he watched me, he didn't like that I wasn't reacting the way he had wanted. Though as he though about if he should let me join or not I oddly enough couldn't read his thoughts, he was blocking me out somehow.

"I don't trust him", Victoria said as she stepped out of the alley and watched me with cautious eyes. She was no fool, she knew I was going to be out for revenge and was starting to think I had gone insane.

"I'll let you join", James said, as he received a glare from Victoria, but he only ignored it. "Though of course there are conditions. You will do what ever I say and you will drink from humans", he said with a smirk. His thoughts were still blocked and it made me nervous, to not know what he was thinking.

Victoria how ever was thinking about hitting James, she thought he was being idiotic letting me join. Too bad she didn't know how right she was, it would save her a lot of trouble. My plan wasn't going to work if I couldn't read James's mind.

"Agreed", I said, no longer caring what lengths I had to go to, to get my revenge.

"Come here then", James said watching me, "you are going to feed."

I walked over to them, keeping my distance from Victoria, just in case she decided I was going to die. I doubted that she would, since James seemed to be planning something from what I could read from her mind.

James grabbed my arm, making sure I wasn't going to change my mind and run for the hills, I could only guess. I felt an odd chill at the touch and refrained from pulling away. He led me over to the gasping human that Victoria hadn't finished off. "Drink from her until she is dead", James said crossly letting go of my arm and watching me with a dark glint in his eyes. Victoria stood next to him, almost shadowing him as they both watched me.

I winced slightly when I saw how much the human girl looked like Bella, but I couldn't let it distract me from my mission. I knelt down and brought the girl up to my chest. She was gasping and crying as the pain whipped through her, I saw the images of her family as they passed through her mind. I hesitated before biting into her neck and drinking her pain away.

I was surprised at how good human blood tasted compared to the animal blood I was now used to. I didn't think I could go back to drinking animal's blood after this. Her now dead body hit the floor as I pulled away and stood up. I glanced at James who was smiling as he stared into my eyes.

I winced when he reached out and cupped my chin to look into my eyes more clearly, "so this is what it looks like when you animal drinkers drink what you are supposed to", he said with a chuckle.

I gave him a confused look, actually getting caught up in the moment, "what do you mean", I asked, my voice sounding strangely distant. Victoria handed me a small mirror from the dead girl's purse and I saw the red specks in my golden eyes. James smiled triumphantly before letting go of me and looking at the sky.

"Looks like we are camping out tonight Vic", he said as he looked back at Victoria, "I want to stay close to this city." I missed the look of disgust and betrayal that passed through Victoria's eyes. Though I didn't miss it as it passed through her thoughts, I looked at her confused but didn't say a word. James ran off and Victoria followed after him. I dropped the mirror before following after them, easily catching up and running next to Victoria.

Why did Victoria feel like that just from having to stay in the city, I thought to myself as I searched through her thoughts at the moment. But all she was thinking about was running and how she hated me being here.

"We stay in the woods Edo at day time most of the time", James said as we ran for the forest. "It's shaded there and if we get hungry there are always plenty of human hikers that get lost", he chuckled darkly at the joke.

Edo, I thought to myself, already despising the nickname, "please don't call me that", I said glaring at James's back side.

He chuckled darkly, "Edo, I will call you whatever I want," he said in a teasing but matter-of-fact way but then in a dark tone added, "I own you now."

He was right and all I could do was keep my mouth shut and remain silent. I hated him even more now. Which was something I didn't even think possible, I already despised him for killing Bella.

We raced through the city silently as the sun and forest neared, my thoughts were clouded with James and Victoria's strange reactions to his equally strange words.

Hopefully my chapters will get longer as I continue with the story, but I keep getting temped to end the chapter with a cliff hanger ^^;

As always please review and tell me if I'm good or what I messed up with lol


	3. Stuck with Vic

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of the characters from it.

Sorry it took me longer than I thought to post another chapter than I originally thought….I've been busy cleaning the house…evil house.

I'll make this chapter longer then ^^

~`~Stuck with Vic~`~

Once we were deep enough in the forest that light would not touch us we stopped. Victoria was still glaring at me, not only did she not trust me but she hated me, though I couldn't read why. Not that it mattered I knew she didn't like me to begin with.

"Stay with Vic, Edo. I'm going off to the city", James said watching me for recognition, in his mind he was making sure I understood I was to listen to Victoria when he wasn't around.

I glanced away and nodded, "sure", I said a little annoyed, I was getting stuck with the one who hated me the most. I couldn't even hold back the sigh; she was probabaly going to boss me around as if I was her slave or something.

James looked at Victoria and they shared an understanding look before he bounded off. Victoria glared at me once James was out of sight, "what are you really joining our clan for", she asked with an accusing tone. She already knew the answer to that and she knew she was right.

I opened my mouth to lie, better than telling the truth and getting my plans ruined. Though she cut me off before I could even get a word out, "don't lie, what, do you think I am? Stupid? I'm not, so don't lie to me. You're planning on avenging that human girl, Bella aren't you?"

I couldn't even hide the wince when she mentioned Bella's name and she smirked, taking that as a yes.

"You can't kill me to get your revenge if that's what you were thinking", she said with a chuckle which left me confused.

I tensed up unsure if she was going to attack me, but I made sure not to look threatening, "why exactly is that", I asked. I knew lying wasn't going to do anything except for piss her off more, so I figured I'd see if I could get an explanation off her.

She smirked knowing I had given up lying, "he only loves my personality"; she said simply as if that answered my question all the way.

I raised an eye brow and looked at her curiously, what the hell was that supposed to mean.

She rolled her eyes, "you're not very smart are you. He doesn't love me like you love Bella. He loves me, but not in that way", she looked away and I caught sorrow in her eyes.

I felt guilty and was about to apologize but the sorrow disappeared and she glared at me, "enough of this. Set up camp", she snapped as she threw a bag at me. I hadn't really noticed earlier but she had been carrying a camping bag.

I pulled out the fold up tent and quickly set it up and put various things out to make it look like we camping out in the woods. "Are you going to tell James", I asked after I was done setting up.

She had been gathering wood around the camp site and paused to study me. I tried to read her mind but she was making it clear that I wasn't getting to know what exactly she was thinking about.

"No", she said after a moment of silence, "I care for James, but you're not going after him, you're after the person he loves, like you loved Bella. Correct?"

I nodded mutely in response; I wanted James to go through what I went through. I wanted him to have to endure the same pain I felt.

Her eyes lit up with amusement, "I won't tell him. But you will find there are many different types of love, and it's possible there isn't one whom he loves like that", she said with a Cheshire cat grin. "I won't tell him. Though if you give me reason to, I will attack you and kill you without hesitation if I think you're a threat to me or him."

She didn't make any sense but after a while I realized I had dramatically dropped my guard around her. She was actually pretty easy to be around. I watched as she pulled a book out of the bag and sat on a rock to read.

"Does he run off like this often", I asked curiously and she looked up from the book to give me an annoyed glare.

"Are you always this annoying", her tone was annoyed, "if you keep this up I might shove a dirty sock down your throat so far that it will come out the other end."

I looked away, she had meant that threat. "Fine, I'm going to walk around the forest then", I said in a questioning tone.

"Why are you asking me? Do I look like your mother? I don't give a damn if you return or not."

I sighed and walked off, I really would have to remember to not speak with Victoria too much. She still hated me and I knew she wasn't going to suddenly become nice.

~`~that night~`~

I had spent the day roaming around the forest, making sure to avoid hikers just in case too much sunlight came down from through the trees. I returned later on when the sun was just going down, Victoria was still reading, and it looked like she had gone through three books several time since I saw a small pile of books next to her. James was just arriving at the camp site; I was surprised he had stayed out that long.

James looked at me surprised, "you survived being around Vic", he asked looking at me with a smile, "I'm surprised. By now I expected she would have ripped your body apart and thrown it in a neat pile for fire wood."

I looked away; I hated him talking to me. That was the bastard that killed Bella, my Bella, the one I love. And here he was trying to make jokes with me as if we were actually friends.

He walked up to me and grabbed my chin to make me look at him and I jumped slightly. I hadn't been watching him so it shocked me when he was suddenly right in front of me.

"Edo, if you're not going to make being around you any fun then I'm not going to want you around me", he warned all trace of humor gone. "Especially if you're going to act like you're upset with me. I might get the idea that you're trying to kill me or Vic as revenge."

Our eyes met and even though I still couldn't read his mind, I felt extremely threatened, even if the initial threat wasn't in his words. I felt Victoria's eyes on us but I didn't look away from his eyes in case it might upset him.

"I'm just distracted", I said looking in his eyes and trying to judge his reaction, it was much harder to study people when I couldn't read their mind. "I did just left the coven I've been with for most of my existence", I pointed out.

James laughed and let go of my chin, "yeah, your coven spoiled you. I'm sure living out in the woods like this is something completely new for a little house pet like you."

I glared at him, "I wasn't a house pet."

"Edo, did you forget? I'm the head of this coven and what I say goes. Without question. If you can't follow a simple rule like that without getting upset then we have no reason to keep you around, hmm?"

"No, I did not", I promised, "I can follow that rule." If I got kicked out of their coven now, then I wouldn't be able to find out a way to get my revenge. I had to hold on to the hope that there was a way for me to get my revenge.

James smirked, "good boy Edo", he then looked at Victoria, "want to hunt?"

She set the book she was reading aside and got up, "yes, I'm sure Edward is hungry too"; she said glancing over at me.

Of course she would have to find some way to get back at me, though she was right I was getting hungry. Though I hated the idea of drinking from humans, and I was pretty sure James was going to insist that I drink from humans.

James gave me a curious look, "Edo, are you hungry", he asked.

I wanted to lie, but if he caught me in a lie I might risk the chance of getting kicked out of the coven. "Yes", I said looking at the ground ashamed, "may I please drink from animals?"

James eyes seemed to light up, "of course not, you shall drink from humans with us Edo. After all, it is best for us all to stick together."

I sighed in frustration, "alright"; I gave in, knowing I would fail in an argument against him.

~`~end of chapter~`~

Sorry it's not as long as I wanted but at least I'm finally updating again ^^;

Warning you all I won't be up dating too much for the next week but I will defentaly work at keeping the story going and I will /not/ forget about this story until I finish it ^^

Thankies for reading and not giving up on me ^^ will post the next chapter as soon as possible.

Loving those reviews by the way lol


	4. Where do you go?

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of the characters from it.

Sorry for not putting anything up for 15 days…. I had writers block and was busy…

But yet again I promise I will finish this story, before 2011 ^^: and I'll probabaly finish it in a month anyways so no worries there.

Thank you for the reviews. And I'll work on putting the commas and periods in the right places ^^

~`~Where do you go~`~

For days we did the same basic thing, during night we would travel and during day we would hide out in the woods or in abandoned homes. Every night we hunted humans and James wasn't changing his mind on that, which only made me hate him more.

I still couldn't read James mind freely, every now and then I got a glimpse into his mind, but it vanished almost instantly. I still didn't know how he was blocking me but I hated it, it seemed like he could tell when I was trying to read his mind since when ever I di and failed he would smirk at me.

The man that took Bella from me was making me kill innocent people daily, he insisted on picking my victim for me and they always were the most innocent people. I hated reading their minds and seeing what I was taking from them. Seeing their last thoughts of how they would have lived differently, or of how they should have told so and so that they loved them. It was always but after a month of it I was growing cold to their last thoughts. It could only hurt me if I let it and I had stopped allowing it all together.

Vic always was watching me and if I stepped out of line at night with James around she scorned me the next day. I didn't care and my thoughts were slowly becoming more twisted and angry at James.

One night he came back after a day out and told us, "we're staying in this city for a while," he said casually. Vic seemed upset when she heard that but didn't say anything as usual.

Oddly enough I was starting to feel sympathy for Vic, even though I was supposed to hate her. It just seemed like we had connected from getting stuck together every day. Even though she always did the same thing every day, she just sat and read all day, never talked to me unless I did something wrong. Sometimes she let me borrow one of her books to read, but other times she just ignored me completely.

James smiled at Vic, "I guess you have no arguments with that?" Then he turned and looked at me, "what about you Edo, you want to argue with me," he asked with that knowing smirk on his face.

It made my blood boil and I fought to hide my anger since that would only make things harder for me to get my revenge. Which I couldn't have happen, I couldn't loose it all after being around that bastard so much.

Vic watched me curiously, wondering if I would finally blow my cover and she would finally have to kill me.

"No, of course not", I said calmly once I had composed myself. It wasn't like I minded staying here it was just the way James looked at me that made my blood boil.

I was going to follow James today ands find out where he has been going, I would have to tell Vic. Otherwise she would think I was going to kill James, which I wasn't planning to yet.

I could tell Vic cared for James, but it seemed to only be a bitter sweet love and it somehow made him feel bad for Vic. So if he chose to kill James then he was going to tell Vic ahead of time.

James lead them on their nightly hunt and once they returned back to the abandoned building James decided to take off again and leave them there.

"I'm going to follow James and find out were he has been going every day," I whispered to Vic, since I could tell James was in hearing distance.

She looked at me curiously and chuckled, "have fun," she said with a smile. I wanted to know what she thought was so funny but the thoughts that I could read was her reading a book.

I nodded and then took after James, I had a easy time keeping track o f James since his clouded thoughts were easy to identify. I made sure to stay out of sight as I followed him through the crowds of people as he walked down one of the main streets.

He turned down a alley the rested between a hotel and a all night club and I followed him easily. Though when I turned down the alley I was shocked to find James was gone. I looked for doors but couldn't find any, I checked the brick wall at the end of the alley in case there was some secret passage or something like in some movies.

I didn't find anything but jumped when I heard a thud as something landed behind me and a low chuckle. I could tell it was James and turned around to face him, frowning slightly since I hadn't like that little trick he pulled.

"Edo, you've got to be kidding me, I'm a tracker. And your not very good at following, you're much to loud and you get in eye sight easily," James said with a laugh. He walked forward and I backed up against the wall. He pinned me against the wall with his hands on the wall on both sides of my shoulders.

I didn't like how close he was to me and leaned all the way back against the wall trying to put some distance between us. Since James was leaning forward against the wall which made us closer than we should be. I was caught speechless, I wasn't that bad at following others, at least I never thought I was.

"I'll let you follow me if your curiosity really is bugging you that much. But there's a catch. If you're going to follow me you're going to have to be mine for the night," he said in a sinister tone which made a chill run down my back.

"Your's", I asked looking at him felling vulnerable with out the ability to read James's thoughts. "What do you mean yours," I didn't understand what James meant and that worried me.

He smirked looking more amused than anything, "how about I give you a little hint Edo", he said the enjoyment thick in his tone. He then leaned forward and pushed our lips together for a kiss. He let his tongue slip between my slightly parted lips and roam around my mouth, before I could even react.

I froze at first but then I felt a heated feeling in the pit of my stomach and melted into the kiss. I let his tongue roam my mouth and raised my own tongue to taste his. I snapped back into reality when he pulled away from the kiss, chuckling lightly.

"Good enough hint, Edo", he asked in a teasing tone, "I not having one of my clan think they can follow me and then walk off with someone else."

Once I realized who I had just let kiss me I chocked on air and started to gag. James pulled away as I had my little fit. I had let that bastard kiss me and even had the goal to kiss him back I was disgusted with my self.

"Don't worry Edo, it's only for tonight. You're not going to follow me ever again after tonight. So we wont have to worry about this little arrangement happening again", he looked at me with a smirk and rose a eyebrow, "right?"

I had finally stopped chocking and gagging when I quickly shook my head, already wanting to head back to Vic. But I couldn't since I had to know where James has been going. I need that information to get my revenge, I couldn't just give up now.

"Right," I said in agreement, I definitely was never going to follow James again after I got the info I need. I was surprised when I noticed that James looked a little turned down by the response. "We wont have to kiss like that tonight. I mean since all you care about is me not walking off. Right?" I didn't want to enjoy a kiss from that man and if we kissed again and I liked it I would probabaly go insane.

"Depends on the situation Edo, lets just hope you can act as well as Vic. She used to go along with me all the time," he said with a shrug as he watched me with amusement in his eyes.

Now I knew the reason why Vic had such feelings around James, but that wasn't making too much sense. I couldn't see why Vic didn't just tell James, she didn't seem like someone who would just let others trample all over her and ignore her feelings. But then again I haven't know her for too long so my option didn't matter. It pissed me off slightly that James would just play with Vic like that, I just hoped James didn't know how Vic felt. Since if James did then I was probabaly going to have to let Vic burn the bastards heart.

"Alright, lets go then," I said wanting to get this over with. I needed to dig up some dirt and I was going to have to dig fast. Since there was no way I was going out another night with James.

~`~end of chapter~`~

Lol finally some James Edo action right ^^;

Next chapter should be up sooner since I already have lots of fun ideas for it *yay for inspiration*


	5. Finally

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of the characters from it.**

**Sorry it took me so long to write back, I could blame writers block…but I knew what to write so there wasn't any blockage…I just simply wasn't inspired or motivated ^^: However I've gotten some inspiration **

**However, I must unfortunately inform you all that I will not finish the story before 2011…but I **_**will **_**finish it. Better late then never right?**

**Also because of the delay I am now open to non positive views *holds out bat for people to hit me with***

**Yet again sorry for the delay at a cliff hanger ^^;**

**Simple Guide for this chapter:**

Regular wording

_Music_

Emphasized wording

~`~Finally~`~

I watched James carefully as we walked together, being careful to stay behind him giving plenty of space between us.

I could almost still feel his lips against mine; it was nothing like being close to Bella's warm lips. But somehow the seemingly cold kiss had been heated; I had never felt that way with Bella. The shocking difference made me curious, I actually want to try it again.

Though I was still disgusted with myself, I had enjoyed that way too much. In fact I could still taste a faint trace of apple from when our tongues had touched. I found myself wondering how a vampire, who doesn't eat human food could taste of apples but quickly tried to think of something else.

The first thing that came to my mind was Bella, how she smelled of flowers and tasted of strawberries. How warm her skin felt against my icy skin when I embraced her or kissed her. The thoughts reminded me of Bella's cold, and lifeless body and why I was here now. How I had to avenge her and make James pay, Victoria was excluded from my plans.

I lost my thoughts as a glowing neon sign that read 'Lavenderists'(**1**) it was colored in the colors of the rainbow and was down a dark alley way between two buildings.

I looked at James curiously after looking at the sign and saw him stopped and looking at me as if he expected something from me.

"Edo, come here and walk with me unless you forgot our little deal", James said with a slightly raise light brown eyebrow.

Hesitantly I walked up to him and allowed him to wrap his arm loosely around my waist. Which made me feel like a female, but I knew if I voiced a complaint James would just smirk and remind me of my promise.

Even though I could already hear the loud music a while back it increased dramatically as we entered the club. I listened to the words as I looked around the crowded club that was full of guys only.

_You gotta help me out  
It's all a blur last night  
We need a taxi  
'Cause you're hung over and I'm broke_

"Dance with me?" James asked making sure to add a tone to his words that made it obvious it was not a suggestion.

_I lost my fake ID  
But you lost the motel key_

Before I could even answer he whisked me way to dance floor. Of course once we were there I glared at him accusingly not liking the situation as he started to grind against me. Though I quickly gave in and followed his movements. We moved together in beat along with the music, keeping or hips dangerously close as if we were connected by the hips.

_Spare me your freaking dirty looks  
Now don't blame me_

_You wanna cash out  
And get the hell outta town  
Don't be a baby  
Remember what you told me_

I had been to a club with Alice and my brothers several times before so I already knew how to dance. Though somehow this was different then being with my siblings, since I was used to dancing with them or with other vampires in Alaska, but dancing here with James somehow seemed different.

_Shut up and put your money where your mouth is  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas  
Get up and shake the glitter off your clothes now  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas_

It wasn't even the obvious reason that I was at a gay club, which I had never been too nor planned on going to. It wasn't even because Alice wasn't here shoving random drinks into my hand and telling me to at least try it.

_Why are these lights so bright?  
Did we get hitched last night?  
Dressed up like Elvis  
Why am I wearing your class ring?_

Those normal reasons didn't even begin to describe why it was so different to me, though they did probabaly add to the factor. It was because I felt that familiar heat from earlier in my stomach and hips as I grinded against James. I wanted to get closer to James, continue that kiss from earlier and possibly even farther.

_Don't call your mother  
'Cause now we're partners in crime  
Don't be a baby  
Remember what you told me_

Did I have a crush on James? The bastard, that killed my one true love Bella, my Bella? Times like this made me miss Alice, I wanted to talk to her. Get her option on what I was feeling towards James and why I haven't felt like this for anyone else. Even though she always seemed so hyper and clueless she always gave me helpful explanations on how my feelings affected me. 

_Shut up and put your money where your mouth is  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas  
Get up and shake the glitter off your clothes now  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas_

Even Carlisle's fatherly words of wisdom would help, even though he was pretty sure Carlisle would disapprove of it. Even more helpful that Alice would be Esme, his pretty much adopted mother. Esme most likely wouldn't disapprove but he still had always favored Alice's words over Esme's when it came to advice. Since Alice always seemed to see both sides. Esme was possibly just a bit too delicate when it came to talking about his feelings. 

_You got me into this  
Information overload, situation lost control  
Send out an S.O.S._

I was pulled out of my thoughts when James grabbed the back of my hair and then kissed me. I was so surprised I left my lips slightly parted and had to stop myself from letting out a groan from the sudden attention as James moved almost impossibly closer. This time instead of simply just slipping his tongue into my mouth he started to lightly suck on my lower lip.

I fought the urge to simply just melt into those arms as all the noises around us seemed to blur together and seem distant. As if it was just me and James and all the people around us didn't exist. I couldn't even smell the quickly pulsing blood of the humans in the club. 

_Ha, and get some cash out  
We're gonna tear up the town  
No, don't be a baby  
Remember what you told me_

I wrapped my arms around James and held him close to me, not even thinking of how he would react to that. Bella's name didn't even come into my mind, all that existed were me and James. 

_Remember what you told me  
Remember what you told me  
Told me, told me, oh yeah_

I couldn't stand the teasing notion of James sucking on my lip and pulled back lightly to once again let our lips meet. This time I took initiative and slipped my tongue into his mouth savoring the sweet but faint taste of apples. James didn't object in the slightest and let his own tongue slide against mine in a small battle of dominance. 

_Shut up and put your money where your mouth is  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas  
Get up and shake the glitter off your clothes now  
That's what you get for waking up in Vegas_

James pulled away and lightly kissed me on the lips before slipping out of my arms and grabbed my hand. He lead me off to the bar were he spoke to the bar tender as we both sat down on the bar stools, "I'd like a apple martini", he said then turned to me, "what would you like Edo?" 

_That's what you get, baby  
Shake the glitter  
Shake, shake, shake the glitter  
Gimme some cash out, baby  
Gimme some cash out, baby _(**2**)

I couldn't believe he would so calmly and casually act as if nothing had happened between us and then ordered, "I would like a absinthe with ice water(**3**)", I said casually. Though now I knew why he tasted like apples at least, which still was a little weird for me to think of a vampire who tasted of apples.

James looked slightly surprised but didn't say anything against when I ordered so I just shrugged and looked off silently sulking.

_Eenie meenie miney mo  
Catch a bad chick by her toe  
If she holla (if, if, if she holla) let her go_

James lightly trailed his hand along my jaw line as I looked away and I looked at him with a surprised expression to only see him smirking at me. In return to his smirk I frowned which only seemed to make him chuckle.

_Shes indecisive  
She cant decide  
She keeps on lookin  
From left to right_

"What?" I asked giving James a accusing glare and pitifully trying to hide the fact I was silently pouting over how he kept ending our kisses. The confusing emotions I got from being around him didn't help me to hide my pouting.

_Girl, cmon get closer  
Look in my eyes  
Searchin is so wrong  
Im Mr. Right_

"Nothing, you just look cute when you pout", James said with a sarcastic smirk which only made me blush. Damn it, I knew he was only picking on me but I couldn't even stop myself from blushing. "Too cute", he added then tipped my chin to steal a kiss.

_You seem like the type  
To love em and leave em  
And disappear right after this song.  
So give me the night  
To show you, hold you  
Dont leave me out here dancin alone_

This time I pulled away still pouting from earlier, and before I could even catch my words they slipped out. "Guys aren't cute", I said rather stubbornly. Then after wards realizing how childish that sounded I blushed and began to look away.

_You cant make up your mind, mind, mind, mind, mind  
Please dont waste my time, time, time, time, time  
Im not tryin to rewind, wind, wind, wind, wind  
I wish our hearts could come together as one_

"Edo, it's not as cute when you pull away", he scolded lightly before capturing my lips in a almost passionate kiss. This time I didn't pull away and gladly leaned into the kiss, slipping off my barstool to sit in his lap and close the space between us. I wrapped my arms around him as he held me closer. 

_Cause shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova_

I was still irritated and disgusted with myself for enjoying these moments with James, the enemy. Who was beginning to seem less and less like a real enemy, and much more like a boyfriend. Even though I was straight my whole life and he has been blocking me out of his mind the whole night. It was almost like dating Bella again but it was different because every now and then I could see glimpses of his thoughts. They were too vague to make anything out of it though.

_Let me show you what your missin  
Paradise  
With me youre winning girl  
You dont have to roll the dice_

I wasn't too surprised when James pulled away but was shocked when James started to trail light kisses along my chin, jaw, neck and collar bone. My back arched slightly as my breathing quickened. How could something so wrong feel so good?

_Tell me what youre really here for  
Them other guys?  
I can see right through ya_

When the bartender slipped our drinks in front of us we parted and I slipped back onto my barstool, embarrassed by my own actions; even though James seemed very pleased with my actions. We both took a drink of our drinks which made it hard for me not to want to kiss James again to taste the sweet apple taste that must have grown stronger. 

_You seem like the type  
To love em and leave em  
And disappear right after the song.  
So give me the night  
To show you, hold you  
Dont leave me out here dancin alone_

"So…" I started to say, drifting off as I felt James's crimson eyes on me. "I was wondering why is this club open during the day time?" I knew for a fact that most clubs where only open and active at night but this one was surprisingly crowded. 

_Cant make up your mind  
Please dont waste my time  
Not tryin to rewind  
I wish our hearts could come together as one_

James smiled at the question, "I was wondering when you would ask. This club is one of the many clubs that is run by our kind. They have fewer gay clubs but since we're active all the time clubs like this are rather popular. I'm sure you may have found some twenty-four hour clubs?"

_Cause shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova_

"Not that I know of. When I went to clubs with Alice or my siblings we always went at night. Simply because that's what normal people do." I said studying James, however I found my self checking out James. As embarrassing as it was, I knew I was caught when I saw James smirk. At least I didn't have to worry too much, we were supposed to be dating or something at the moment anyways.

_Eenie meenie miney moe  
Catch a bad chick by her toe  
If she holla (if, if, if she holla) let her go  
Eenie meenie miney moe  
Catch a bad chick by her toe  
If she holla (if, if, if she holla) let her go_

"Interesting", James said then with out hesitance let his eyes roam my body, making me feel like I was naked for a moment. "So tell me Edo, why you've been enjoying my attention. I know your not acting. Hell, a blind man could tell your not acting."

_Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
Shorty is a eenie meenie miney mo lova  
_

My pale face heated up as my face turned red with embarrassment, I had to look away quickly to cover it up. "I don't know", I lied, knowing my words were too rushed but I couldn't help it. I could feel his eyes boring into me and it made me feel like my legs were jello.

_Cant make up your mind  
Please dont waste my time  
Not tryin to rewind  
I wish our hearts could come together as one  
(repeat)_(**4**)

James frowned at my response and took a drink of his apple martini. Once I felt his eyes were off me I looked at him feeling guilty. Guilty! Guilty for lieing to the enemy! The one who had killed my precious Bella.

~Skip~

We didn't leave the club until night fall. After that question we spent most of the time at the bar and James left me alone at the bar every now and then to go and dance with other men. We didn't kiss and we didn't dance. It didn't make any sense, what had I done wrong? He couldn't possibly feel anything towards me. If he even remotely cared about me he wouldn't have killed Bella, and wouldn't block me out all the time. Right? Yet again I was missing my Cullen family and their ever helpful advice, along with the feeling of being home with my true family. James and Victoria definitely didn't offer the same comforts.

~`~End of chapter~`~

** 1. Victorian slang for the gays**

** 2. Waking up in Vegas, By Katy Perry**

** 3. I do not wish to encourage others to drink, but absinthe(also know as the 'green fairy') contains a lot more alcohol than most other liquors. The proper way to drink absinthe is with ice water.**

** 4. Eenie Meenie, By Sean Kingston & Justin Bieber**

**Thanks for reading, those who didn't completely give up on me ^^: and I hope the extra long chapter made up for my lateness. **

**I'll try to update soon, and hopefully within this month ^^**

**And yet again I promise I will not abandon this story. I have yet to forget about it since I have started it and trust me, once something's stuck in my head I wont forget it. **

**I would love story ideas and helpful suggestions. **

**Reviews are loved and go straight to my email in-box which I try to check every day. Reviews tend to help motivate me *hint hint* lol**


	6. Bastard

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight, or any characters from it. If I did I would be living on a island by now with all the money it has brought in XD.**

**Alright, so apology time; I really am so sorry it took me so long to write back, I've been busy. As of recently I'm in another state and will most likely be moving into this state. Also I've been in college, just started recently actually. But I'll stay true to my word I /will/ finish this story.**

**Simple guide:**

Regular wording

_Music_

Emphasized Wording

~`~Bastard~`~

When we arrive back at camp Victoria was sitting there calmly reading her book but she had a curious look on her face when she looked up at us.

James looked cocky as ever and just shrugged it off, "as I'm assuming your hungry, we should go off to hunt soon."

I was fuming silently, after being ignored so casually all day I was at my wits end and simply wanted to throw something at him. I knew it made me sound like a girl, but I think after what I let him do, that I should at least get acknowledged and not just blown off.

"Have fun at the club?" Victoria's voice questioned as she eyed James, hoping for some sort of clue as to what happened. As I read her mind I realized she had expected James to make me agree to 'be his' for the night. It actually only fueled my anger.

"Oh yes tons", I said with a snort of annoyance, as I stretched out. Victoria's eyes flashed over to look me over curiously growing as her eyes assessed me.

James glanced back at me as if just realizing I was there, a cruel smirk played out on his lips as he strode over towards me. "Oh I'm so sorry Edo, was I ignoring you too much", he cooed out, his tone was laced with sarcasm and if I was reading it right anger.

I actually surprised me enough to take a step back from his quickly approaching form. I actually felt threatened by the way his crimson eyes slid over my body.

Once I was in reach his hand instantly found its way into my hair and he grabbed just tight enough to pull my hair in the best of ways. His lips brushed over mine as he said, "did you not get enough earlier?" There was this unusual vicious tone in his voice almost similar to a wounded animal. It all left me feeling like a warm mass of jello. Just as quickly as he had approached me he let his hand slip from my hair to turn and walk away from me. I watched him shocked and then looked over at Victoria seeing that she was just as shocked as I was.

"Let's head out", James said as he walked off towards the forest, "now!"

At that both me and Victoria jumped to follow, though as I held a shocked expression Victoria held a purely angered expression.

~**the next day**~

James hadn't spoken to me the rest of the night, in fact no one spoke the rest of the night. James walked off towards the city and I looked at Victoria before taking off after him.

Surprisingly she didn't stop me, even though I looked about ready to kill him. I did catch her last few thoughts before I was off, she for some reason was warning me not to push him too far.

I knew James knew I was following him and he led me back to the same alley way were we had made the deal yesterday. However this time when I rounded the corner I saw him just staring there with his back toward the wall as he glared at me.

I let out an animal like growl in my almost unexplainable frustration as I lunged at him, successfully pinning him against the wall. I hated being ignored; I hated feeling like everyone knew something I didn't. I had almost always known what was going on, maybe it meant I was spoiled, but I didn't care. I never had to deal with something like this and I certainly wasn't going to start dealing with it now.

James didn't fight back; he didn't even looked frightened as he looked back at me, he just looked angry. I couldn't take it anymore, all these confusing emotions. I let out a half hearted growl in anger, "what", I half way growled out as I stared into those crimson eyes.

James raised an eye brow, still looking beyond angered, "what do you mean, Edward?" I actually cringed at hearing him call me by my name for once. My frustration only grew and he let out a frustrated sigh after a moment. "You still miss her, Edward. I know you want revenge, I've known. Yet how you acted yesterday…" A smile graced his lips before disappearing, "yesterday you acted like a school girl. A little school girl. I could have sworn." He cut off, "I don't like feeling like I'm being played with, Edward. I'm a hunter, a tracker. I am the one that toys with others. Yet you have the goal. Tell me Edward, what did you want to happen at the club? At the bar? You wanted more, you've almost forgotten about her. Haven't you?"

"I didn't forget about her", I suddenly snapped, my voice sounded desperate, even to me. It felt like I was fighting for my own sanity to make myself believe that. How could I just forget about Bella? There's no way I would, not over something as simple as just kissing someone like, James. No, there was just no way. "I didn't want anything to happen yesterday", I added, feeling just as desperate as before to make myself believe that.

"Oh, really", James questioned his tone sounding dark and yet, seductive. His hand slipped up my shirt pinching at one of my nipples earning a surprised gasp from my lips as pleasure spread from such a simple action. His other hand gripped my hair, rather harshly, easily forcing me onto my knees as my eyes closed. He effortlessly moved to straddle me as he continued to pull my hair, directing my body until I was lying down underneath him. I had never felt so submissive in my life but right now I was nothing more than putty beneath him. He began to grind against me as his hand worked on my chest teasing my nipples and skin with soft almost feathery touches. I couldn't help the groan as I arched up towards him his hand still holding onto my hair in a tight, slightly painful grip.

I felt his lips brush against my ear as he asked, "oh really Edo? You wanted nothing, hmm? Than what is it you want now? Do you want more now, Edo? Tell me." His voice still held a seductive tone that held a dangerous edge to it. All I could manage was a whimper in response.

His hand slipped out from under my shirt and gently framed my jaw, "open your eyes and talk to me." There was a soft tone in his voice now, he gently let go of my hair and stopped that delicious friction between us. My eyes fluttered open to see his crimson eyes looking down at me with a soft curiosity.

"I don't know", I said glancing away, but when I practically felt the anger rise up in James I looked into his eyes again. "I've never been interested in men, James, never. I…thought Bella was…"

"I thought Victoria was the one too", he cut in looking away as he sat up, "she was always so fiery; great in bed too. I just, we were together for years. We broke it off recently", he trailed off and looked down at me again. His gaze grew somewhat intense, "you're not a replacement though. She was something…"

"Irreplaceable, almost perfect", I cut in, glaring up at him slightly; "Bella was mine."

"That's why I killed her", James half whispered, looking sorrowful as he looked away.

"WHAT", I yelled out as my hands rushed to shove him off me, making him fall off me and onto the ground. I sat up to glare at him, "YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"

James sighed and sat up, "I couldn't-"

Yet again I cut him off, "don't you dare try making a excuse. You damn, fucking, asshole." I stood up, and was about to take off, but James shot up as well and suddenly pinned me to the wall.

"Don't you dare try walking away from me", he snapped, "it was bad I know. I did it for foolish reasons. And I don't blame you for being mad at me. I guess I was."

"What jealous", I snapped, I had caught that short thought as it flashed through his mind, "I should fucking kill you!"

The hurt look that crossed James features briefly made me want to apologize. It was shortly replaced with a blank look, "I thought you would, Edward. I think I wanted you too, I was full of guilt. Victoria is strong so she doesn't show it, but she knows I've been out clubbing, finding one nighters in attempt to fill in what I lacked. I know it hurts her. I guess seeing you with Bella, feeling so happy."

I couldn't take it anymore, "don't make me feel sorry for you. Please." I let out a irritated sigh, "I'm not going to. If anything I'd let Victoria kill you first."

James let out a weak chuckle and moved away from me and the wall, "she wouldn't kill me. Though she does seem to be very protective of you lately, I don't think she would. Despite everything we still love each other you know. I suppose it's more of a friendship now though."

I gave him one last glare before moving away from the wall. "I hate you, James", I said bitterly as I looked at him, "I hate myself for wanting you, like I do. For feeling like I do. I hate you for killing Bella, yes. But I hate you more for this. Making me feel like this for you…now all I want to know is why. Why did you…"

James looked away, having the decency to look guilty, "because I was jealous, because I missed having that feeling. I only let you join us because I was curious, I knew you wouldn't hurt Vic, she's too strong to let you. But yesterday, I was just messing with you toying with you. I guess you could say I'm attracted to you. I want you Edward, badly. But not enough to say I want a relationship."

I let out a frustrated sigh, "what? You want a one night stand? You want to fuck with my head and fuck me while you do so." I growled out and then walked up to him so that our bodies were pressed against each others. "If you wanted that then you should have just taken it, I won't give that to you."

James was surprised by how bold I was being but surprisingly took a step back, "Edward. Go back to your family." He started to walk off and I placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Stop, I…" I couldn't help how hurt I looked at that moment, I had expected anger, maybe disbelief, but not this.

"You want more than I'm willing to give, more than I have", he said as he turned around to face me, "I'll admit I wanted to 'fuck' with your head. But Edo, if you think I'm desperate for sex or something, then you're dead wrong. Even if I do want you, there are others I can have, others I can seduce and get them to want me. I don't take, not like that. If you think it's different because of."

In anger I gripped his shirt, "it is different and you know it. Don't lie to me."

James raised a eyebrow and smirked lightly, "alright Edo, alright. I'll let you think that. I'll even go as far as to believe you. If, you can prove it."

I smirked at that and pressed him against the wall letting our lips smash together in a passionate kiss. Sadly that kiss was mostly brought on by anger, I needed to vent it all out some way and for now this is what I needed. I wasn't a virgin; I had dated before and even if they weren't always solid relationships I had had sex several times throughout my life. If there was anything I had learned it was that sex was the best way to let out your emotions and forget you problems.

James didn't argue and soon enough I felt his hand tugging my hair, bringing me down to the ground again. He found his way on top of me, still not breaking the kiss as he began to grind against me again. He pulled back from the kiss, "Ed-"

"I know", I cut in reading his thoughts, he was about to tell me this wasn't proving him right, "damn it, I need it right now", half groaned, and half growled out. I heard a heated chuckle at that, before I felt his lips kissing along my neck and collar bone. I worked on removing his shirt only for him to suddenly stop and hiss out a few cuss words.

"We are out in the open Ed, we need to go inside or something", he said through clenched teeth. I could feel his own need against mine and smirked knowing exactly why he hated having to point that out. He frowned at me and I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped my lips as we both got up.

James muttered something under his breath, "are you going to tell me how I'm wrong? Are you going to prove it?"

"Vic, was mad at you. I know she wouldn't be mad at you for something like that unless it meant more." I said a bit confidently as I brushed off my clothes.

James looked thoughtful for a moment, "maybe, but it's not enough…hotel?"

At his suggestion I chuckled and nodded, it was a cloudy day so we didn't have trouble strolling through town as we searched for a hotel.

~`~end for now~`~

Sorry for the slight tease XD I'll hopefully get to work on the next chapter and have it out this week.

Comments are appreciated, since it would be nice to know if anyone still reads this.

Thanks for reading! Love all the comments so far by the way.


	7. Update

i wanted to let everyone know, i still intend to finish this. it is just taking a lot longer than originally intended. currently i can only use the internet on my phone, hence why i can not use upper case letters. hopefully i will load a new chapter in the next month.


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